Addicted to Rembrandt
------------------------------
If I go to the nightclub and do my hair and choose what I wear and
try not to stare at the girls there, I feel older than I am, a contestant
in unnecessary competition, it can be like that on stage, the feeling of age,
the self imposed shadow on my mental state, the pressure to joke and not
bring people down, cause it's friday night and they all deserve a smile.

See I can be glad when I'm in Amsterdam with my little lady there, checking out
the Rembrant, cycling around, trying a new way of thinking I've found for ten euro
a gram, what a messy plan, betting on football and losing it all cause it's the middle
of the night and I don't know the (Indonesian) league so well, making love and then making
her laugh, feeling so young all over again, yeah

It's a sky blue new young world out there
It's a sky blue new young world out there

I must apologise for my monotone, please don't hate me, please don't rate me low,
I can assure you the next one will be more to your taste, it's a song about a cat killing bears,
The thing that I hate most about that kind of guy is his constant need for affection and love
when he rarely shows it to others, his brothers, self pitying addict, a shame to his mother.


Albufeira
------------
A sunny day and I'm a loner
In Albufeira with a group of friends
But none of them mine

I walk the road and my bare feet are burning
cast an eye on a little kitten looking terrified

A sudden dawn (little light) in my mind and I make my way to the old town
With a view of finding food so to feed him and make him fine

And after all it's just a pocket full of pennies and I've eaten
already and really don't mind not drinking tonight

So he asks for more and I indulge him, it's got me thinking of Oliver in Dickensian times
And more show up and now I'm worried they'll get get accustomed and be lost to the world
When I'm flying high

Then we're walking down to the restaurant for dinner and this creature is following
in hope of more food like I gave him last night

My godfather's drunken, not looking where he's going, and he nearly steps right on him,
and I wish I'd never tried to help him.


Darling
----------
You know I can't find the words
To tell you darling how you bring a light to my life
Cause I've never been short of enemies even if they're in my mind
And you always know the way to calm me down and keep me warm and satisfied

I broke down and cried and died and lost you all at the same time
Oh no, what a sublime demise, what have I sacrificed, how could I have been so short of sight,
But (oh) the nights have seemed a little colder just now and I hope we might be back together, I hope you realise
That while the whole world is warring, well I just want to relax
And lay there all day with you and hold on for happier times
And stay in one place with one girl to laugh with and love and rely on
And love you til the day you go again


I think you knew me too well and you'd see straight through my words at what I was getting at
But you didn't need no more doctors then and I was hardly qualified, instead I was all depressive and withdrawn
and would negate each happy sign. I was sure that I would never make enough to live the life we had always talked about
With the litle children running around and Calla all fat and old and grand with a cat flap made of gold and sandy toes maybe once a twice a year,
Or a little home in amsterdam where we could go when work was getting us down, well the thought of happy times denied made me lose my mind but made me realise

That while the whole world is warring, well I just want to relax
And lay there all day with you and hold on for happier times
And stay in one place with one girl to laugh with and love and rely on
And love you a little more for each day I missed you



Just The Way
------------------
First it goes to anger
before disbelief and shame
then you want to find out
where he lives, that guy,
cause he's out on bail
and he's partying the night
after leaving you alone
with a house but not a home
keep going joe are the words echoed
through the village and through the throats
of the locals and the people stopping by

But who am I to cast that sort of line
I couldn't quite begin to understand
The way you're feeling about the future
Or the things you've left behind
It's just the way it goes from time to time

I get back to the apartment
looking the key to box kept for
security and the passport I needed
before I could pack up and leave, stumble
on a photo on the table by your bed of you
and her on the night before the shotton
colliery crash, and though the alcohol
is bleeding bad and I just want to leave,
I cannot put it down,
I couldn't quite begin to understand
The way you're feeling about the future
Or the things you've left behind
It's just the way it goes from time to time


Now it's gone and done, but you'll meet
again, or if you don't then does it really matter
if your last thoughts are still with one another.
No it isn't fair, but for now i'll hold the tidal waves
out of my mind to try to make you feel alright today
and everyday that we're on holiday together now
But who am I to make you feel this way
I cannot quite begin to understand
The way you're feeling about the future
Or the things you've just left behind
It's just the way it goes from time to time



kCal Superman
---------------------
I wish that I could make you love your body but maybe not
I wish that I could make you see what I see, with all you've got

Wish I could be your pro bono calorie superman
I could keep the dark in the night where it belongs
Wish I could clear away all the cloud of the cataract
I could make you see what a wonderful thing you are

I'd never known a girl so fine and pretty but not for show
I never thought that it would nearly kill you but now I know

Wish I could be your pro bono calorie superman
I could keep the dark in the night where it belongs
Wish I could clear away all the cloud of the cataract
I could make you see what a wonderful thing you are
Wish I could make you happier looking at yourself
I could be your partner in crime, all would be well

I wish that I could make
you love your body,
but maybe not



Leaner
--------
In the autumn term or in the summer, you might have her, you might meet her, you can hear her talk of literature and her son who means the world to her
But she's nasty when the feelings wrong and she takes it out on those she's got on her roster, like my little girl who won't eat now, I keep telling her

You've got it all
You'll be just fine
You can do anything to which
You set your sweet mind
Be an astronaut
Be a lawyer
Be a lollipop lady
Be a thief

The next year I came to meet her for myself, I heard her lecture, she was kind at first, I felt bad for her, she had bruises and varicose veins
But I still had reservations cause of my girl who would cry at the sight of her and her methods so Darwinian, in the wild we both would have died

You've got it all
A wonderful find
You can do anything to which
You set your sweet mind
Be a poet
Be a zookeeper
Be a critic
Be a spy

Final year I tried a letter on Wordsworth when he was aging and moving righter like my brother, she denied me with her horror,
"You are struggling with your monsters, I'm afraid to say that I'm very concerned", well now we've both been pulled apart by her, if we fail we fail together

You've got it all
I think that you'll find
You can do anything to which
You set your sweet mind
Be a mother
Be a monster
Be a lecturer
Be a bitch


Lefty
-------
Do you want to get mad about the way things are at
Well well, yeah I guess I see the way you're thinking
Cause I can't get a job and I worked pretty hard
And now I feel my self esteem is sinking
But I see a bright light in the esther
But it only shines brighter
When we light it together
When we light it for each other

Do you want to put down the ones who find it hard it to live in a world which expects nothing more
Than dealing with violence and scorn on behalf of a company man who can pay them
I see a bright light in the ether
But it only shines brighter
When we light it together
When we light it for each other

You say slavery's done and it's morally wrong but god knows can we call it free living
If they're forced into zero hour contracts on minimum wage because you all know how much they're gonna need 'em.
I'm starting to find this whole thing a little misguided, a little pure evil.

But you know things have been bad before and I know things will get better
When we start seeing growth we might all be more balanced and further from anger

Hey man check my IQ, see it's right in the middle, I know that maybe I don't have much to offer
And I'm fully aware that I hate it when others are so narrow and angry and polar
I see a bright light in the ether
But it only shines brighter
When we light it together
When we light it for each other

But you know things have been bad before and I know that things will get better
When we start seeing growth we might all be more balanced and further from anger
But for now some'll treat Cameron like Hitler

I'm overwhelmed by the voices I've heard screaming out for a return to compassion
I'm stepping out now, I don't know who is right now, I see millions of jerry cans dripping
And I see a bright light in the esther, by love or by fire, choose to help or do nothing
And you'll see what happens



Little Baby Luke
----------------------

The first time I knew you was through a picture on a phone, from a million miles away I knew you were gonna grow up to do great things one day
Maybe you'll be leader of the big old USA, or the kind of guy who doesn't feel the need to prove his name.

And I'm aware that we don't talk these days
I want you to know I love you all the same
Sometimes growing up can make things change
When people get old they can lose their way

Maybe you'll be a football pro (though you call it soccer in the states),
or an elementary school teacher just glad to earn an honest wage
Maybe you can learn guitar and put your uncle jack to shame
The whole wide world is yours to take, don't ever be afraid

And I'm aware that we don't talk these days
I want you to know I love you all the same
Sometimes growing up can make things change
When people get old they can lose their way

I hope I get to meet you with your mom and dad some day
And talk about the time we've lost and hope for better ways
To navigate the contrast in our separate mental states
And focus conversation on whatever we're doing that day

And I'm aware that we don't talk these days
I want you to know I love you all the same
Sometimes growing up can make things change
When people get old they can lose their way



11/10/2013
//////////
Gallery 47//
//Political Differences
//////////
I get up
I get out
I get back
We fall out
You think I'm impolite
I think you're on the right
You think I'm narrow minded
I'm losing my mind cause I try
To be good so I fail to be kind
To some of those in my life who
At night, after wine, in common company,
Grow a little moustache and lace their love with caveats
Only for the types that they know
They say that I should grow up
And that's alright
But I would rather not talk
Than talk and fight,
It's like you're saying,
"I do not know to please you"
When inside you're thinking
"I do not know how to leave you"

I fly home on my own in the middle of the night after losing my temper and starting a fight with my mother and brother and his future wife and
I feel like the whole world just wants me to die and I'm alone. That's alright, money's tight, we'll get by, I got my little lover on the phone
and Paul just down the road, my brother calls to tell me we're done and I should apologise for my words last night, says that nobody there thought
I was right, and I feel like screaming "I do not know how to please them without sacrificing all I have grown to believe in".



Quiet Concerns
---------------------
I've got a scar
Red on my thigh
I was ill but
I didn't die
I didn't die

I got an ache
Down in my lung
I gotta watch those
Carcinogens

I've got a mark
On the back
Of my tongue
The doctors
Never got
Anything done
Anything done

Oh come home girl I'm pacing round the room again
I can no longer pretend I'm not going round the bend

I heard a car crashed into our sweet anne
I'm terrified, not going outside (ever again)


___Seasonal Affective___
I heard them fight the other night through the walls
About something not right in one of their lives
In the government bill or in the world or
Nothing more than modern times
But now they're laughing all day long and
Listening to Donovan and amusing ever so loud
slapstick and proud, with the happy light on,
and the libido back again, you know that diagnosis works
for you but for me i'm afraid not of night nor of day
nor of season nor failure nor fame,
but of myself on a day when the
Sunshine isn't showing and
The demons win the game
This is our happy place and our home
But I don't feel secure
The burglary next door has
Nothing to do with it, no
It's the way I feel when I find out
That something bad's gone on
I lose my faith in it all
Like I said,
When the world gets you down
You just need them around
And I know what I'm like when
I get dark in denial
I'm not there right now but
the star is dipping behind the clouds
I'm running to the taxi guy
With a twenty or four fives
Taken from the money box
Next to the typewriter
And the TV license bill
We haven't paid for
A few weeks now
I want to hold your hand
And promise you the world and smile
But inside I'm terrified of nature and crime
And the stoic inside is doubting his line
That kitten might have died in Portugal
Just like Nietsche said it's indifferent and barren at times
Though it's fruitful and seemingly kind at others
Wish I hadn't argued with my brothers


Hey Dad / Seroxat Maxim / 7 Inch Records / Get With The Times
________

Long ago, I knew my father but didn't know why he felt that way
I'd try my best to make him laugh when the dark clouds came

Mother said it's chemical, his serotonin levels were low
But I'd make a vow to make each day a little happier

Hey Dad, how's it going man? Would you like a cup of tea today?
I've been checking out your 7 inch records from the olden days

But now and then he'd look at me a little mad,
So tired of always hearing he was sad,
He was dealing with the feeling through a plan
Which none of us could understand

I got older and I started to relate
Sometimes it's better to restrain the hate
In moral terms it's not okay to blame the
people you're around when you feel down

Hey Dad, hows it going man? Would you like a cup of tea today?
I've been checking out your 7 inch records from the olden days

Now I only talk when
When I think that I'll engage him
In recollection of happy thing
Or when I need a stamp or something

////\\\\////\\\///\\\\_47

Smoking Isn't Cool
-------------------------
I want to grow older
I don't want to die young
Each day I see a picture
Of a blackened lung

I get real scared and I eat more and drink more
I get guilty and I worry and I smoke more

I want to grow older
I don't want to die young
Each day I see a picture
Of a blackened lung
On the packet,
Does it stop me,
No it doesn't

Don't Start
Don't Start
Don't Start


The Hernia Diet
---------------------
I used to work out for a while all around these big strong men,
With arms so wide they could crush my fallen five six head,
I would eat meat every day, carb cutting, firm stomach and
Read magazines and a protein cook book and then
My wall gave in

Now I won't ever lift a weight again you know I got a hernia
A real war scar bet you ain't ever seen better
I was never gonna be another Arnold Schwarzenegger
It's a pity that they found another problem with my body just then

In the hospital bed the doc came in
He said, "If you please" on his knees, "would you drop your boxers hence"
He drew a little mark next to my good man with his black pen
He freaked out at the sight of a n0n-sarcoma then

Now I won't ever light a weight again, cause I'm gonna die
A real war scar, but I'm gonna die
They thought it was lipoma then so I'm gonna die
But after months of waiting it turned out to be fine

If I ever make some money I'm gonna give it to those less lucky
If I ever make some money I'm gonna give it to those less lucky
If I ever make some money I'm gonna give it to those less lucky